Put Your Shoulder to the Wheel

July 7, 2012

Hey to my fam,

I hope you all enjoyed your Fourth of July celebration! I want to see some pictures, so don't be shy, just send 'em to me! We didn't have a celebration for the 4th. Well, I guess we kind of did. We came in an hour early because the mission president asked all missionaries to do so for safety reasons. It was kind of funny because here in Moorpark they celebrate on the 3rd by doing fireworks and whatever. I guess it's just a tradition here. On the Fourth we did have dinner at a member's home, and we got to eat some burgers, so I felt right at home because I was guessing that is what you all had to eat as well!

This last week was a great week as far as teaching goes! We got to teach a lot of our investigators and had the opportunity to talk to many people who became new investigators. We got to finally catch a referral that we had received from a sister in the ward. The referral is Nancy. When we finally caught her at home, we were able to teach her the full restoration lesson right then during our first meeting with her. She is really great. She just expressed a desire to learn and know more about God and what he wants from us. She came to the baptism in Westlake with the member that had referred her. It was the baptism of these two twin girls that are on a TV show on ABC. You will have to look it up, it's called Suburgatory. They're super cute and I felt the spirit so strongly as they were baptized. Anyway, Nancy had a great experience at the baptism, and told us that she felt really light and full after being at the baptism. Right after, we taught her at the member's home. We showed her the restoration video to make sure that she fully understood and then explained the importance of the Book of Mormon and praying about it because the first time we taught her we had run out of time to explain. She is really excited about everything. She kept talking about all of her friends that she would invite to have lunch with us or other things like that so that we could talk to them about the gospel, too. She also said that she wants her children, two sons, to learn as well, but not until after she has learned more so she knows what she is talking about when they ask her questions. She is definitely one of the Lord's elect!

We were able to meet Kayli this week. She is a young lady who is 19 years old and has been going to church for 3 years. We met with her because she has yet to be baptized. She knows that the church is true and that she needs to be baptized, and she wants to be baptized, but she is afraid to ask her dad because she doesn't want to cause a rift between them. She could get baptized if she wanted, but she really respects her father and wants him to be ok with her being baptized. As we spoke with her, it seemed that it was too simple; she just needed to ask her dad. The problem is that she is too scared and it seems like she is just waiting for the "perfect" moment to ask him. As we did weekly planning after meeting with her, when we were discussing what she needed in order to continue to progress, we took a moment and just thought. In that moment I said a prayer to myself, asking the Lord what Kayli needed to do in order to be baptized so that she can have the gift of the Holy Ghost. After I finished my little prayer, I thought for a moment longer and got the idea that Kayli should pray to know what day she should be baptized, not to pray to know when to ask her dad or how to ask her dad. I felt really good as I shared that with my companion, and I know that if she does that she will be putting her trust in the Lord. We are meeting with Kayli on Wednesday, so I'm really excited to share this with her and help her come closer to being baptized.

We had a little bit of a scare this week with Wendy. She had cancelled our appointment on Thursday because she said that work was too hectic. We thought that was fine, but as we tried to contact her over the next few days she wasn't responding to any of our calls or text messages. We decided that we would give her space, because Wendy really likes her independence. She doesn't like to seem like she needs anyone else. We were really worried about her, but we knew that she would come to church on Sunday so we could talk to her there. Well, Sunday came and she wasn't there. That really made us worry, but we didn't know what to do. We had her address, but she didn't know that we had it. The elders who were here before us had it somehow and they had written in the area book that she didn't know. Since it is Wendy, we weren't sure if it would be ok to just go drop in on her. We went about the rest of our day according to what we had planned, but when 8:30 came I just felt like we really needed to come in contact with her somehow. We then went to the car and said a prayer to know what we should do. Right after the prayer I felt like the idea of visiting Wendy no longer seemed "scary" or like it would be an inconvenience to her, so I shared that with my companion. When we got to Wendy's apartment and saw her, at first she seemed a bit "weirded out" by us being there at her home, but as we expressed our concern and love for her, her expression softened and I could tell that she was grateful that we stopped by. She is still doing well, but she had been sick all day so that was why she hadn't attended church. It was good that we visited her, because she had gotten into an argument with a friend, who is a member, and had felt like she wasn't sure if she would be ready to be baptized by the 21st. We were able to reassure her and we had the impression to talk to her about getting a priesthood blessing. It was a great experience to see how the Lord uses us to help his children. We are literally instruments in his hands.

Last preparation day I was in Ventura because of exchanges that my companion had to go on, as one of the traveling sisters. We went to lunch with two of the sisters who were at the church emailing when we were. One of the sisters, well Hermanas, was Hermana Hulm. I had sat by her the day before at church, because we had to go to the Spanish branch in Ventura, so she was translating for Sister Wilkinson and I. She was really fun, and we talked a bit after church and decided that we needed to get together on P-day so we could talk more. Well, we went to Taco Bell for lunch (Nan's fav) and as we were talking we figured out that we have a lot of the same friends from BYU! She actually kind of dated one of my good friends at Liberty Square and knew all of his friends that I had spent most of my time with when I lived at Liberty. We also figured out that she almost went on the same trip to Vegas that I had gone on with those friends. It was really fun to find that connection and it was fun to get to know her. It is definitely apparent that we will become great friends, or we would if we could be companions, which can't happen sadly, but we'll be able to become good friends somehow because we decided that WE HAVE TO!

One thing that I have been focusing on a lot this week is tender mercies. I remember Brandice talking about them all of the time when she wrote home as a missionary, and as I read in Ether this past week, I read about how when the Jaredites arrived in the promise land they got out of the boats and gave thanks to the Lord right away for all of the tender mercies he had given unto them. That struck a chord with me, especially because I had been thinking about tender mercies for the days preceding that. I decided that it would be a good thing for me to start recording at least 1 or 2 tender mercies at night each day when I write in my journal, because as I go through hard days it is important to really reflect and see how much the Lord really does for me and especially for this work. Anyway, I encourage you all to take the time and think of the tender mercies the Lord gives you in your daily lives. It has already been so good for me to do so. It makes me seek to have a more grateful attitude as I serve and as I live my life.

This week I read the talk in the last conference Ensign by Sister Dalton - it was her address at Young Women's conference. As I read about the swimmer that allowed the fog to cloud her vision and get in the way of her goal, I realized that there were things in my life that I need to repent of and change so that my vision of the goals I made for myself before my mission is not hindered. I prayed a lot to know what I really need to apply this to, and I realized that I need to let go of my pride. I don't mean pride in the sense of thinking I'm the best missionary ever and that I don't need the Lord, because trust me, I definitely know that. That's probably all I know for sure. I mean pride with others. I need to be humble with my trainer and allow myself to learn from her. I'm a confident person and I have always had trouble being teachable, right dad? haha. I just realized that the pride that I hold when I'm around others is getting in the way of the possibility of having really great relationships with my companions. It's been hard. I feel like lately I have just been recognizing all of my weaknesses. I feel like instead of one large mountain to climb, I have like 7 or 8 and I feel anxious because I just want to get over these weaknesses as quickly as I can. I was having a hard time yesterday with this, thinking about all of my weaknesses. I was feeling pretty emotional, too, so you know what that means...PMS. As I read in Ether still, I read Ether 12:27. It talks about how the Lord gives us these weaknesses to make us humble, and that as we are humble he will make them strong. I am grateful for my weaknesses, because it means that I am able to progress and come closer to my Savior through using his atonement to make those weaknesses strong. I know that seeing these weaknesses is definitely a blessing that the Lord has given me, because if I didn't even recognize them I would not be able to overcome them. I know that the Lord knows what is best for me, but especially what is best for those that I teach. He knows what changes that I need to make so that I can be a better tool for him to spread his gospel.

Well, while all of this thinking about my weaknesses was happening, I also became a bit upset with myself because I feel like I am spending too much time worrying about myself and my weaknesses when that time should be spent thinking about others. I just want to be able to "lose [myself] in the work" as President Hinckley was told by his father, and as I was told by my dad. Ugh. It's just hard. I need to get over my weaknesses and I need to make myself better, but really I need to be thinking about others! I have so much to learn. These 12 mountains I have to climb are a bit intimidating, but I know that I can do this. I know that it's better for me to have these concerns and be thinking about these things than to not be. I do have a desire to be the missionary the Lord needs me to be, so I guess that's my answer. I just need to put my shoulder to the wheel and push along. Right mom? Isn't that like one of your favorite songs? At the same time as recognizing all of these things, I also have been looking back on the few weeks, which feel like 7 years (I won't lie), and I can see so much progression in myself. I am so grateful that the Lord allows me to see that, because it helps me to put my shoulder to the wheel. It helps me have even more faith in the atonement and the changes that I can make through it, because I have already been making changes that I have desperately needed.

Anyway, I'm so serious these days! Dang it! Here's a funny story. Last week when I was in Ventura with Sister Wilkinson, we knocked on a door and a man opened it and immediately invited us in. I was like "Oh great, members that won’t let us leave for like 30 minutes," and I started to try to think of ways that I could get us out of there. When we sat down and started talking with them we found out that they are some other religion, protestant or something, and they just always invite any type of missionaries in because they appreciate the work we do. We had a nice discussion with them, and we shared a message and they were sharing their beliefs with us, too. The man had actually been baptized in our church, but hadn't been active for like 40 years. He was not interested in our church. They had very strong beliefs in their church and said that they would read the Book of Mormon. That was great, I thought. Then we asked if we could say a prayer with them before we left and they were like "Actually we would like to pray for you!" Then the man proceeded to speak in tongues in the prayer. I was like WHAT THE??? Haha. I had no idea what was going on, I just looked over at him and he was a shakin’ and a groovin’ all over the place. IT was pretty funny. As soon as we got into the car, Sister Wilkinson and I died laughing. It was great!

We have one investigator that we've gotten to teach so far and I had a great spiritual experience with that. Her name is Wendy. She is the one that Hermana Tippetts called and talked to you about. She is ready to be baptized and her faith and her desire are both great testimony builders to me. Yesterday, as we taught her, I was desirous to really rely on the spirit and teach her what the Lord wanted me to teach her. As I prayed to have that experience, I found myself speaking to her with the spirit present. I felt the spirit strongly throughout the entire lesson and I really felt like I was being guided by the spirit in what I said to her. She wants to be baptized, but she is having a hard time understanding why she has to give up coffee and clove cigarettes to be baptized. I know that she felt the spirit yesterday as we taught her, so I am confident that she will be able to do it!

We contacted one family in the 1st ward that has a mother that is active, but the rest of her family is less active. The Eaton family. I feel strongly that we can really help their daughter, Bianca, as we invite her to come teach with us and as we go and teach their family. There is also a boy, Marcos, who hasn't been baptized yet who is 13 or so years old. I know that the Lord wants us to work with them and help their family.

WELL, I love you all so much! Have a great week. Mom, I didn't get an email from you, so send me a letter. Tell Cort to also. Oh and make sure you save all pictures I send to you because my camera is weird and whenever I load pics from it, it loses those pictures. Let me know if they've worked. Ok I love you so much! Keep praying for the work to go well!

Love,

Sister Bennett