The Lord Loves Me

November 11, 2013 

Dear Family,

This week was such a great week for me. I felt like myself. I feel like I've grown so much closer to my Heavenly Father. I've really been trying to understand what His will is for me for the remainder of my time here. I want to do all that I can and all that He expects me to, so I spend a lot of time praying and pondering on how I am to help the sisters and especially Sister Stoker. She really needs me right now. She struggles with doubting herself and the assignment she's been given. She gets discouraged very easily, and I know that I need to help her with that. I've never felt as much joy as I have when I'm working with these sisters, and I know the reason for that is because I'm not focused on myself at all. Whenever I've gone through hard things on my mission, during the time that I've been a Sister Training Leader, when I've gone on exchanges they always changed things for me and made me feel way better. It's a choice to be happy.That's a huge lesson I've learned, and now I need to teach that to Sister Stoker. I feel that sometimes she just looks for what she can be upset about and then dwells on it rather than looking for the good things and the tender mercies in our lives. We talked a lot about that this week, because after one of our exchanges she felt really discouraged because they didn't have a bunch of lessons or find new investigators in our area. She's worried about our area because we don't have a ton of people we're teaching. However, I know that the Lord will provide us with people to teach. There is no doubt in my mind because He has done it time and time again as I've had this assignment. I don't know how to help her understand that. She needs to go forward with faith and have hope that He will provide. That's my focus right now, helping her trust the Lord more. I have experienced too many miracles from the Lord's hand to not trust Him. Sister Stoker can learn the same thing.

We had Mission Leadership Council this week and it was excellent. I learned so much about being a better leader and really about what's in store for me after my mission. I look forward to being a mother, because I know that's why I've really needed to learn the things that I've learned on my mission, especially the things about being a leader. The Lord is preparing me to raise His choice spirit children, and He needs parents who are up to the task of doing it righteously in this very confused/unrighteous world. I felt the Spirit testify to me that everything is going to be ok when I end my service here as a full-time missionary. It was hard at times during the meetings because I am really going to miss this. I love being a missionary. I love feeling so close to the Lord and being with people who are just as close to Him. I loved singing "We'll Bring the World His Truth" knowing that I am one of those servants who is bringing the world His truth. However, I know that I can have these things in my life after the mission. I will have a husband who is close to the Lord, and together we will bring the Lord's truth to our children and also to others through callings and assignments in the Church. He will be my favorite, and best companion. I know that. There is so much to be done as a member of the Church, and I'm really praying that I will be prepared to do all that the Lord needs me to do as a returned missionary.

The exchanges I went on this week were excellent! The sisters I went with, and I, had some wonderful experiences and saw some AMAZING miracles! I love miracles, so it's nice being a missionary since we see them all the time! My first exchange this week was with Sister Platt in Santa Barbara. She's brand new and she is so shy and unsure of herself. I couldn't believe it, because when she musters up the courage and starts teaching, she's so great. I really just spent the entire day telling her that she is doing great and that the Lord will help her. That's the hardest thing as a new missionary, just learning to trust the Lord to use the knowledge that you've gained to bless the lives of others. It's a blessing to go out and open our mouths. We get to test the Lord's promises every single day! Every day, I see Him fulfill those promises. He has never failed, and I know He never will. That's what Sister Platt and I spoke about a lot. She said she felt better at the end of the day, so I just hope she'll take what she learned and keep pushing forward.

On Thursday, I went on an exchange with Sister Arndt in 4th ward. I love her so much. She's such a kind, loving person. She said some of the nicest things to me, and I could feel my Heavenly Father’s love through her. We saw a HUGE miracle together. We went and taught a lady named Lydia. Originally, we hadn't even planned to go and see her, but she texted us and said that she wouldn't be able to meet with the sisters on Friday. Sister Arndt texted her and asked if we could see her that day, and she agreed. We went over, and before we got out of the car we stopped to talk about what we would teach her. That morning, in companion study, we had planned to teach the gospel of Jesus Christ lesson to a man named Ronnie, but he hadn't been home. When Sister Arndt told me about Lydia, she said that Lydia hadn't committed to baptism yet, but she loved the Church and everything that she was learning. I really felt like we should go ahead and teach her the lesson we prepared for Ronnie and invite her to be baptized. The lesson went great. The Spirit was really strong and Sister Arndt and I taught really well together. Lydia understood everything that we talked about and I felt a huge push to invite her to set a baptismal date. She said that she couldn't set a date because in the Catholic Church they were taught there is only one baptism. She said she understood what we were saying about the Priesthood, and she needed time with Heavenly Father to work through the idea of being baptized again. We invited her to pray specifically to know if she needed to be baptized by someone with Priesthood authority and we left. We went to dinner and then had a lesson at the church right after dinner. When we got out of the lesson, we had a text from Lydia. It said "I think I've gotten my answer, and I'm ready to talk baptism." WE FREAKED OUT! We called Lydia right away and she said that she had been praying and the "answer came through loud and clear" and she said she wanted to be baptized. Sister Arndt started crying and I was just beaming! I didn't know what to do, so we just hugged. That was an amazing miracle. I know that we were blessed to have that experience because the sisters there in 4th ward have been obedient and the Lord trusts them to teach His children. Sister Arndt is doing a wonderful job. She's grown a lot from her experience with training. I love her a lot.

My last exchange was with Sister Thurgood. She came to Ventura and worked with me in my area. It was a great day. We just went out and taught together like we'd been companions for months. I love it when that happens. She has changed a lot. She follows Preach My Gospel somuch more closely, and because of that we were able to work well together. I really enjoyed getting to know her better and sharing things that I've learned with her. She had a lot of questions, and I could just feel her desire to learn. She's doing really well.

One quick miracle from our area, Ghana, Bob's friend who used to really not like us, invited us to come over for Thanksgiving! We told her that we already had plans, but she asked us to at least come by for breakfast. We said that we'd come after studies for a little bit. Her heart has been softened so much! Plus, she said she'd come to church with Bob when he's feeling well enough to go since he just started Chemo-therapy treatments. That is a huge miracle!

The Lord sure does love me, doesn't He? I'm worried about telling you all about all of these great things going on because you'll see that He really favors me. Hahaha. He loves His missionaries!

I don't have time to write more, but I'm doing great. Ugh. I wish I had more time, because there are SO many more miracles. The Lord is providing us with people to teach. That's all I can say. I love this work. Sister Stoker and I are happy and working hard to help the sisters in any way that we can. We're just continuing on!

We're speaking next Sunday in church, so pray for me! It needs to be good because we're hoping that a lot of non-members will be there! I'll let you know how it goes in my next email. I love you all!

Love,
Sister Bennett

Sister Arndt and I

I’m Learning to Float … Kinda

November 4, 2013

Dear Family,

There was a lot more going on this week, so it was a lot better for me. I didn't have a lot of time to really think about myself and how I'm feeling, which is so much better for me. I'm grateful for the sisters. They've helped me feel really happy this past week, even when I'm still missing Sister Burwell a lot. Our time together was such a positive thing and I don't want to discolor the way I look at those memories because I feel bad that she's not here. That was my goal this past week, to enjoy the memories we have and to make new ones with these other sisters. I'm very grateful to Sister Castro for giving me that advice in an email last week. Last Monday, after I emailed and got everything off of my chest, we played sports with our district and I had an eye opening experience. I was still thinking a lot about what Sister Castro had written to me. It felt really good to spend time with the sisters, to encourage them and make them feel good about the things that they are doing. I love hearing about the people that they're teaching, the fun moments they have in their companionships and the things that they're learning. I loved just cheering them on as we played sports for an hour. That really lifted my spirit a lot and helped me see how happy I can be even without Sister Burwell being here. It's a lot different, but it's still good.

We had two exchanges this week. The first one was in Santa Maria, and I took Sister Kiyotani with me to work with the sisters there. We had a lot to talk about on the ride up to Santa Maria. I felt really grateful to have her with me, because I knew that the sisters that she'll work with this transfer are going to benefit so much from their experiences with her. She's so diligent and focused. She had a lot of questions, and I was grateful to have the opportunity to train her and guide her on how to be effective in this assignment.

I worked with Sister Mason in Santa Maria. It was a good exchange. The day went pretty fast because Sister Kiyotani and I had to leave early to get back to Santa Barbara so we could meet up with our companions. Sister Mason talked about how she wanted to be more confident. She felt that because she came to Santa Maria and Sister Higgins is the senior companion, she should just basically take the back seat. We talked a lot about that and how she needs to keep pushing herself to grow, and taking the backseat wasn't going to facilitate more growth. She's changed since my last exchange with her. She's more outgoing with people and isn't afraid to talk and teach them. She's doing well. I felt really happy as I was there working with her, because she's so easy to be around and to focus on. Selflessness really is happiness.

The second exchange I went on was with Sister Xayadeth. Sister Stoker worked with Sister Shipp that same day, so that was Sister Stoker's first exchange. I love Sister Xayadeth. She has grown so much! She's overcome her homesickness and the little obedience setbacks and has really committed herself to this work. We talked a lot about it, and about how she did it. She said that she just realized that she wasn't happy because she wasn't letting herself be. She realized that she couldn't keep one foot at home and still be happy here, so she changed. Even what she put on the wall in front of her desk changed. She used to have pictures of her family and friends right in front of her desk, but now the wall is decorated with pictures of Christ. That was so neat to see. They've been struggling to find people to teach in their area, so I was glad to help her see different things to work on so they can find more people to teach. We talked a lot about being persistent and the Lord blessed us to see the blessings that come when we are persistent. I'm always so grateful for that! I can tell them how being persistent is important, but it's so much better when the Lord provides a physical example of what I'm trying to teach someone on exchanges. That just helps me see that He supports the things that I'm trying to teach.

In our area, we saw some cool miracles. We haven't had many people to teach, and it was making me feel a little stressed. I knew that the Lord would provide, because He has so many times before. I was just feeling impatient. That's still something I need to learn! Patience! Anyway, we spent a lot of time finding on Thursday, Friday and Saturday. The great part was that we were pretty successful! I want to share one miracle that happened at the ward's Halloween party. Sister Burwell and I, back in May, talked to a man who was out by his garage working on some little motorcycles. This man's name was Sonny. He said that we could come by and talk to him more, so we got his apartment number and went by another day. When the door opened, Sonny's wife, Jessica, answered and didn't look happy. Basically, she told us that Sonny did this all the time, he invited religious people over so he could mess with them but really wasn't into religion at all. Well, since Sonny wasn't interested, Sister Burwell and I started teaching Jessica. She was very adamant that religion wasn't for her and that she wasn't interested. We left. About 4 weeks ago, Sister Burwell was inspired, as usual, to go try Jessica on exchanges. She told her about the Trunk-or-Treat that would be happening on October 30th. Jessica actually showed some interest in it but Sister Burwell didn't have a flyer at that point. Well, during Sister Burwell's last week here, we stopped by together to give Jessica a flyer and she said she'd be there. When Sister Stoker and I went to the activity on Wednesday, I had totally forgotten that Jessica would possibly be coming, but when we got there a member came up to us and said that some lady was looking for us. I looked over and there was Jessica sitting with her three kids! We went over and talked to her and immediately she turned to me and told me that she wants us to come over and teach her. She said that she needs to know more, she feels ready, and wants to be able to answer her kids’ questions about God. I was so excited! She set up a time with us right then! We gave her a tour of the church and she really enjoyed it. She felt super welcomed by the ward and seemed excited to come to church sometime. That was a HUGE miracle! The Lord just places people in our paths, and if we're listening, He'll show
them to us.

Anyway, that's all that I have time to write about. It was a pretty good week. The few days we had in our area just going out and finding together were harder.  It's a challenge, but the Lord has helped me so much. I can feel Him supporting me, and I can also feel how patient He is with me. He understands how much I love her and that it's going to take a little time for me to totally have control. I'm improving though. That's good! I'm starting to learn how to float here on my own....kind of.

Thank you, mom, for the Halloween package....Erin, thank you as well for doing an activity with the youth and sending me even more candy. I think you all want me to be chubby when I get back. Rude.  haha. Sister Stoker and I just relaxed on Halloween night and ate some of our candy. We had to come in at 7:00pm to be safe.  I could've handled it! It wasn't super eventful, but I'm trying to attach a picture of us....it's very similar to the one I sent last year of Sister Putnam and me.

I love you all,
Sister Bennett

Sister Bennett with Sister Kiyotani and Sister Higgins

Sister Bennett with Brother Laws and his gross costume

R to L = Sister Bennett, Sister Xayadeth, Sister Shipp, and Sister Stoker

Sister Bennett and Sister Xayadeth

Sister Bennett with Sister Higgins and Sister Mason

"We just trust in God and go on."

October 28, 2013

Dear Family,

Well, this was the longest week of my mission....and the hardest.  I feel like I've just been thinking about myself all week and how hard things are for me. Of course I won’t feel happy if I do that, but at the same time, it's really difficult to just ignore how I'm feeling. This is how I feel: I miss Sister Burwell a lot. I knew that I would.  I think a huge part of why this week has been so hard is that while she was here I was so focused on her and helping her feel better that I didn't take time to figure out how I was feeling. It's hard to think about how we'll never be companions again.  We'll never teach together again, we'll be living in different places. I know that we'll be best friends forever, but how can it be the same?  As I've been praying, I have felt Heavenly Father’s love for me. I know that he's aware of how I'm feeling. I feel a lot of comfort as I pray and I know he's there listening. Anyway, that's what's been going on with me. I'm trying to stop having such a pity party. Other people need me right now, so I need to push these things aside and stop focusing on myself. That's what I'm really striving to do right now.

Sister Stoker is doing ok. She is so great but she doubts herself a lot. I understand how overwhelming it is at first to have this assignment and to feel like there is no possible way that one is qualified to do this. That's how she's feeling right now, and I'm grateful for that. I'm grateful to see how humble she is, but also that I'm here to help her not go too far with that. There are so many reasons why she will do so well as a Sister Training Leader, and it feels good to tell her those things. She's felt very unsure this whole week and I think it's a little weird to be my companion again because I was her trainer. It's almost like she thinks it needs to be the same as the last time that we were companions and she should take the backseat. We've talked about that a lot and I've really stressed to her that we are totally equal companions. I need her to push me right now. I know that she will help me do the things that I want to accomplish this last transfer - mainly wearing myself out in this work. I want to leave my entire self on the altar of sacrifice, and I know that she's the companion that will go with me to do that. She'll do really well working with the sisters, it's just the anticipation that gets her. It would seem like there's so much to learn and do, but when it's time to just go and do it then it all comes together just fine. She has her first exchange on Wednesday and I'm excited for her to have that experience.

We had an interesting experience this week with an investigator named Andrew. He's in his late 30s and has heard a lot about the church. We weren't planning to back to teach him, but Sister Burwell went back and set up an appointment for us. Thanks Sister Burwell. :) Well, we went back and Andrew said that he had done what we asked – read part of the Book of Mormon and prayed about it. He said that his answer was to tell Sister Burwell and I to do something in return. He wanted us to pray and ask Jesus who He is for 5 days, in a quiet place. I told him that Sister Burwell was gone, but I would do it. It's not a big deal to me. The only problem is that I don't pray to Jesus, I pray to God, but I didn't bring that up with him. He really wanted us to come back so he could ask me what my answer was, but I didn't want to spend time there with him because he has no intention to learn. However, the member who came with us, before we left, asked what day we're coming back. Oh well, so now we're seeing him this week and I will be telling him the answer I've gotten. I've been praying and asked who Jesus Christ is, and the answer I've received is just a greater focus on Him throughout the day and as I read my scriptures. It's actually been very good for me. I don't know how Andrew will take it, but we'll see!

One miracle of the week was when we went to see Bob, one of our recent converts, to read the Book of Mormon with him. He recently had a brain tumor removed and he struggles with his speech, so we go over and read the Book of Mormon with him because the doctor said he needs to be reading out loud. Well, when we went over twice this week, both times his roommates, Alan and Ghana, came out and sat with us. That is a miracle! Ghana would never talk to us before and would always be inside and avoid us. Now, she came out and she's read with us and kept telling us how great she thinks we are and the church is. We invited her to come to the Halloween trunk-or-treat and chili cook-off and she and Alan said that would come and bring Bob! That was amazing. I was so taken aback about that, because they just have always seemed a little embarrassed/ashamed to talk to us because of their lifestyle. Ghana said that she really appreciates how we don't judge her and are really kind even though she lives in a different way than we do. I am grateful that the Lord has softened their hearts, because Bob needs that support from them. They support him so much more now. That is wonderful.

Well, there's a little update from the week. I'm doing ok. I just keep thinking about a phrase from the "Joseph Smith: Prophet of the Restoration" movie that we watched this week with Brother Dumond. Joseph, when in Liberty Jail, says, when asked how to endure well, "We just trust in God and go on." I keep telling myself. I want to be more temperate. In our gospel principles class yesterday we talked about talents, and Sister Wood said about another member that she was really impressed with this member and her temperance and asked her how she did it, and the other member said "I just keep going, be steady and be strong." That's my goal. Just keep swimming, right? That's what we do...we swim.

I'm fine. Keep me in your prayers. I do need them.

Love,
Sister Bennett

P.S. - We got the Halloween package, Mom. Perfect timing...Sister Stoker was wanting candy right when I opened it. Haha. :)

Sister Bennett with Sister Castro at transfer meeting

Sister Bennett with Samuel and Hannah Castro at transfer meeting

Wedding Bells Are Ringing...​.with a SPLASH!

October 21, 2013

Dear Family,

My last companion will be.....drum roll (Ammon or Jordan) please......Sister Stoker! Do you remember her? I was her trainer! I'm excited to have her with me for my last transfer! I'll be staying in the 2nd ward with her, so that's really a huge blessing as well. There's actually going to be another set of English Sister Training Leaders this transfer as well. They'll be working in Camarillo, but we'll be seeing them a lot. President Castro told me that basically I'm training three sister training leaders at once, rather than just one. He also made it very clear that I have a lot on my shoulders - their success will depend primarily on me. No pressure, right. Woah. That's a heavy load to bear sometimes, but it'll be ok.

This past week went by so fast! Usually week six is a regular week of missionary work, but this past week was just as crazy as the rest....which was probably for the best. It's good for me to stay busy so I don't let my mind go where I don't really want it to go. We had two exchanges this past week, and both went really well. I love serving the sisters. We met last night with President Castro to talk about the trainers and who they're training as well as what's going on with the other sisters. As we met with him, I felt a great deal of anticipation. I felt excited for the new situations that the sisters will be in and the things that they'll learn. I'm excited to see how they'll change as a result of their new companions and areas. I really felt so much love for them and I realized how much I really think about and desire their success as missionaries. I love every single sister. There isn't one sister that I would skip over. I think about all of them all of the time and I always look forward to seeing them. I never saw this being such a huge part of my mission. When Sister Burwell and I look back on our missions, we'll be looking at a very different picture than a lot of missionaries. Yes, we've had baptisms and taught less-active, but we've had so many other investigators that have progressed and grown as we've taught them - the sisters. That's really neat. I'm so blessed to have been able to experience this for so long. I have so much that I want to accomplish for my last transfer. I feel a huge sense of urgency and a weight on my shoulders, but I'm grateful for that. I know that with the Lord's help I can accomplish all that He has planned for me for these next 6 weeks. I'm going to exhaust every last bit of myself in the Lord's work. That is my goal for this transfer.

I'm dreading seeing Sister Burwell go, but I need to move on. President Castro was very straight forward with me about it last night and told me that I need to cut the cord and move on. I still have a lot of work to do, and he's right. The Lord needs me too much for me to be moping around here missing Sister Burwell. I've set goals that I want to achieve and President has things that he needs me to do, so I won’t have time to even think about that or about the great and dreadful day coming in December. This work is great, because if you don't want to think about something you just get busy and think about others and you're fine!

Now onto exchanges! Our first exchange this week was with Sister Morrison and Sister Hiatt. I worked with Sister Morrison for the day. We only had a half-day exchange because Sister Burwell and I had to finish doing the week 5 report. It was a very productive day, even though we only had half of a day. Sister Morrison has such great potential and I feel like she wants to reach that potential, but at times it seems she's afraid that she'll fail. Due to that fear, I think she holds back on being totally obedient or putting herself totally in the work as a defense in case she fails. Then, she can say that she didn't do all she could anyway, so that's why she failed. It hurts more to fail when you give every ounce of yourself. However, she's missing the point. When we're on the Lord's errand and we do our best, we will NEVER fail. I was pretty straight with her about those things. I told her that it's time for her to choose to be obedient, to live her purpose, and focus on others. She took it well and it seemed like it's exactly what she needed to hear. She'll do well this next transfer. I know that she can be such a great missionary.

The last exchange of the transfer was with Sister Hegstrom. We worked in 4th ward for the day and it was great. She's doing really well. It's so easy to see how much she's grown since I was with her....training definitely has that affect on people. I love her a lot. I'm glad that I was able to go work with her, possibly for our last time, and teach her more. We always have such great conversations about missionary work or about the gospel. The Spirit was strong the entire day as we talked with each other. She will do well with whatever the Lord requires of her. She still has areas that she can and will improve on, but she'll get there. The Lord will take her there.

This past weekend was a very busy weekend. It was an amazing weekend. Jed and Stefanie were married on Friday, Jed was baptized on Saturday and confirmed on Sunday. It was the perfect way to say goodbye to Sister Burwell. We were both so glad that we could be there together and have that experience with each other. The wedding was great, but it wasn't the highlight for us. It was definitely an important stepping stone, but Bishop Allen touched on the truth of the matter when he did the wedding ceremony. He talked about how he didn't have the authority to bind them as husband and wife for all eternity. He made it very clear that the authority he has would only keep them together until death. He then spoke of the importance of the temple and the sealing power. I felt the Spirit a lot as he spoke about it, and I know that Jed and Stefanie see things the same way. They will be sealed together as husband and wife in a year, and that day will be the most special compared to every experience that we've had with them. Jed's baptism was amazing. Throughout the entire service, I couldn't take my eyes off of him. Even when people were giving talks or whatever, I kept watching him because he just looked so happy. He was honestly glowing. I could just see and feel him communicating with his Heavenly Father. He seemed to be off in a different place where no one else could join him except Heavenly Father. I felt of God's love and how proud He is of him when Jed was lifted out of the water and stood there clean and pure. He couldn't keep the smile off of his face for the rest of the day. I love him so much. He has changed my life. I've never met someone who loves Heavenly Father in the way that he does. I know that Jed is so close to Him and because of that, I've come closer to Him. It's been such an amazing journey with both Jed and Stefanie, and they will be a part of my life forever. Amazing experience. I love this work.

I'm so excited to work with Sister Stoker. I know that it's exactly what needs to happen. She's exactly what I need and I'm exactly what she needs right now. I love her so much and we already have a great relationship. I'm grateful for that, because we'll be able to hit the
ground running. We have a lot to do, so that's a really great thing!

I love this work. I can't say that enough.

Love,
Sister Bennett

Sister Bennett and Sister Morrison

Sister Hegstrom and Me on our exchange

Jed's baptism!

Sister Burwell and me at Jed and Stefanie's wedding

Jed's favorite action/face

With Jed and Stefanie at their wedding

We wore sweet mustaches for daily planning one night

Bishop Allen with Jed, Sister Burwell and I at Jed's baptism

Stefanie, Jed, me and Sister Burwell at Jed's baptism!

 

Me with Jed!

Teach the Restoratio​n People!

October 14, 2013


Holla Fam! Oh, I mean Hola,

We're one week closer to Jed and Stefanie's wedding and Jed's baptism! I'm so excited, but at the same time I'm dreading the end of this next week. It's Sister Burwell's and my last week together, and we have to do two exchanges. That makes it a bit hard, because we have basically been companions for 20-30 minutes a day while we travel to our next exchange. We never see each other, but remarkably we are even closer than ever.  We're going to make the most of the few days that we have left together. We know it's important to go on these exchanges, because the sisters we are going with need it. The Lord will bless us for our efforts. I'm just really not looking forward to next Tuesday at all. It actually makes me feel rather sick when I let myself think about it. Anyway, I just can't believe how quickly time has passed by. We had 4 exchanges this past week, and they were all really great.

We had two exchanges in Camarillo, one in Agoura, and one in Moorpark. On each exchange, we were blessed to see miracles and I felt that the Lord really helped the sisters have the experiences they needed on exchanges to push forward. My first exchange of the week was with Sister Clark. They had their district meeting that day, so we attended that together then went out to work. We spent most of the day out tracting, and we had some great experiences. Sister Clark is a bit timid when she teaches, and we were blessed with the opportunity to see how persistence breaks down the wall that some people put up. We went to one home to see an investigator that they've been teaching, and the investigator's son answered the door. We talked to him for a while, but he wasn't really interested. I could tell that Sister Clark wanted to go, but the brother of the person we were talking to walked out of the front door. I stopped him. Sister Clark kind of looked at me like "these people aren't interested," but how in the world can we tell if we don't talk to them? We talked to him for a while, and he was really open. He feels like the truth is so distorted today, and he really tuned-in as we taught him about the restoration. We got a return appointment with him so the sisters could go back and teach him. I'm glad that happened. Sister Clark and I talked about it afterward, and she recognized the importance of persistence and talking with everyone. It's not up to us to decide whether or not these people are ready. We just talk to everyone, and figure it out as we go. Sister Clark is great. She's just lacking confidence. I love when I have the opportunity to really build the sisters up and point out their strengths. She has a great desire to be a successful missionary, and she knows who's acceptance she is seeking. That's one thing I really admire about her.

On Wednesday, Sister Kiyotani and I worked together in Ventura. She is struggling with the same thing that I have struggled with my entire mission - being too hard on herself. She broke down and started crying at the end of companionship study. She said she just feels like she needs to hold it in because she's training. She doesn't want to place her burdens on these brand new missionaries who are her companions. I understand how she feels, because I felt that same way when I've trained. I'm glad that we had an exchange together, because I was able to share with her the new things that I've learned about not holding ourselves to a higher standard than the Lord is. She just feels like she hasn't accomplished all that she should have thus far on her mission. That made me feel so sad that she can't see how wonderful her mission has been. She is a missionary who can always be counted on. She's exactly obedient and is a Preach My Gospel missionary. She is letting her perspective of herself be determined more by numbers than by what Preach My Gospel teaches about being a successful missionary. I hope that she'll really understand how to overcome feeling discouraged, inadequate, or less-than what she actually is because Satan will continue to attack her in that way. I know he'll continue to attack me in that way, but those feelings can be overcome if we truly believe in and rely on the atonement of Jesus Christ. Sister Kiyotani is a phenomenal missionary. I've been praying that she can see that for herself.

Moorpark was our next exchange this week. Of course, because I was going with Sister Moure, I was in Moorpark for the day. We like to have the new missionary be in their area so they will take the lead. Sister Moure is so great! She is a doing well with teaching, she knows the scriptures really well and uses them often in her teaching, and she relates to people so naturally. She has an amazing conversion story that she shares freely because she knows that the experiences that she's had can help the people she is teaching. She struggles a bit more with talking to people on their doorsteps or on the street, but we had the opportunity to work on that. I love teaching new missionaries about teaching the restoration in every declaration. Every time I'm trying to make the point that it is the only way to teach people, the Lord blesses us to find someone who is very receptive to the message. Together, Sister Moure and I ended up talking to this young man, Sebastian, who is a senior in high school. He actually knows Anthony, who I taught and baptized in Moorpark, and thinks it was really cool that he is a member of the church. We taught him the restoration, and I now that Sister Moure was able to see, firsthand, the power of teaching the restoration and how it can help people understand why our message is different and how they can know of the truth themselves. Sister Moure is doing really great.

Guess who I got to see when I was in Moorpark!?!?!?!? The Matweyews!!! They had signed up for dinner the night I was there, but they signed up like a month ago and had no idea that I would be coming. Is that by chance? ABSOLUTELY NOT! The Lord blesses me so much. I was so excited that I had dreams all about seeing them the night before. I'm glad we were busy the entire day, or I would've been counting down the seconds! Finally, it was 5 o'clock and time to go to dinner. When we got to their house the door was open and just the screen door was shut. I got so nervous as I was walking up with Sister Moure. That was weird! I mean, I love these people...why would I be nervous? Anyway, I just stood at the screen door looked in, saw Sister M and screamed! I opened the door and ran in! As I ran in, Gavin came from around the corner and screamed when he saw me. We just hugged each other and jumped up and down (whoops...well, the white handbook doesn't actually say we shouldn't hug). We were just yelling and laughing. Then, I turned and there was Sister M. I probably hugged her for 10 minutes! I missed her so much. I haven't seen them in almost a year! Crazy! I just felt like I had never left their home. We had some catching up to do. Gavin has grown so much! Sis M didn't tell him I was coming, so he was in shock for a little bit. He would barely look at me because he was so freaked out that I was there. Haha. It was so funny. It was so amazing to see them. They've progressed SO MUCH in the gospel. I know I needed to see that right now, to push me into my last transfer. I almost wanted to start crying like a baby, I was so happy to see how far they've come. Brother M has the Melchizedek priesthood now. Sis M told me about how Gavin quit a soccer team because they play on Sundays, and Sister M is getting her patriarchal blessing. She said she hadn't gotten it yet because she had been lacking on her scripture ready. I was like "WHAT!? SIS M!?" She replied "I said WAS, I'm doing great now." Hahah. I even wanted to cry just when I heard Gavin pray. The way he prays is so much different now. It's so much more sincere, and thoughtful. Oh wow. I love that family so much. I know that I came on my mission for Sister M. Absolutely. We have such a special connection. We probably knew each other before we were here. I'm so excited to come back for their sealing in December, and we couldn't stop talking about it! Gavin has so many things he wants to do with me. Haha. Brother M was getting a bit choked up, and told me that he and Sis M really feel like I'm the big sister that Gavin has always deserved. That means a lot to me. I love them. I seriously am so happy for them.

The last exchange of the week was in Agoura 2nd ward. I was with Sister Mapa in Agoura. We had a great day together! I just love her. She is so respectful to me and really took in everything that I was sharing with her. She kept saying that she loved receiving correction so she can make sure she's getting everything right. One of her goals is to go through Preach My Gospel and do every study activity and read every page because she said if she's going to be a Preach My Gospel missionary, she needs to really know Preach My Gospel. I loved that! We were able to teach some good lessons. She seemed to want me to take the lead, but I wasn't going for it. I really felt like she needed to take the opportunity to take control. She did just fine with it. She was super nervous, but she pushed through it and just taught the people. Once again, I was stressing the importance of teaching the restoration. I also talked to her about sharing the first vision in declarations and not being afraid to. Right after we had been talking about that, we were looking for a less-active and she led us to the wrong house. She realized that the house we were at was the house of a potential. I told her we should just go try them anyway. When we knocked on the door, a young man, 17  years-old, name Brad opened the door. At first he stood with the door partially open, but as we started asking him questions, he asked if we were looking to have a discussion with him. We said "sure, if you want!" He then asked, "Do you have time for that." "Absolutely!" we replied. Then he came out and his little sister, Kelly (14 years-old), followed. Brad at first seemed to want to challenge our belief in God. He had some questions, and I think he was surprised that we never said "I don't know." We knew the answer for all of the questions he was asking, and we weren't timid about it. We let him know that we know exactly what we're talking about. Brad was raised Christian but doesn't really believe anymore. He said he just really isn't sure. Kelly is still Christian and goes to church sometimes with her mom. I began to teach them the restoration and Sister Mapa caught on right away. We both shared personal experiences of receiving answers and testified all throughout the declaration. When we got to the point of teaching about Joseph Smith, Sister Mapa shared his story including the first vision, just like we had talked about! Brad's eyes changed. They went from doubting and wanting to dispute, to earnestly searching and listening. When she finished sharing the experience that Joseph Smith had, Brad said, "Wow. That is an amazing story." We both bore our testimonies of the truthfulness of Joseph Smith's experience, we taught about the Book of Mormon and prayer and gave Brad a copy. He immediately asked if he could have our contact information. We set up a time to go back and teach him, so the sisters will go teach Brad and Kelly on Friday. I'm so excited to hear about it!!!! I can't describe how much love I felt for him as we taught him. I could feel how much Heavenly Father loves him. I could just see the longing in his eyes to have the answers that he's never been able to find, and to feel the belonging that he'll feel as he comes to know that he is a son of God. That was a powerful experience. Sister Mapa and I were floating to dinner after that. I'm really grateful for that experience for myself, but also for Sister Mapa's sake. She was shown that if we are obedient to what Preach My Gospel tells us and to the promptings of the Spirit, we will be guided to those that are ready to receive the gospel.

It was a fantastic week of exchanges, even though I missed being with my companion. Sister Burwell and I got to teach Jed and Stefanie twice this week. They are doing so well. Jed is so strong. He came to church alone yesterday, again. I doubt that he'll miss another Sunday the rest of his life, he's so dedicated! They're both so excited for this weekend. All of us have been waiting for this for so long, it feels like! The next time you hear from me, you'll be hearing all about how amazing the weekend was! I can't wait!

Love,
Sister Bennett

P.S. - Here's a picture of the Castro kids and I. Then the other one is Sister Burwell and I. We took a short break from planning and walked down the street to get ice cream. 

Sister Bennett with Samuel and Hannah at Mission Leadership Council

Break from weekly planning for a shake? I think yes

Sister Burwell protecting her bagel sandwich (that I made her) while she was praying

EXCLAMATIO​N POINT!

October 7, 2013


Dear Family,

YOU HEARD IT! It's time to do missionary work....exclamation point! Time to be member missionaries, people! When I was watching conference I kept thinking, "This is going to be so great! The brethren are backing up what we're trying to get the ward to do! Now no one can say 'no!' Hah!" Then the thought came, "What's my family doing to be member missionaries? Am I letting them off too easily?" Yes. No one ever shares missionary moments with me. What's up with that? I'm a MISSIONARY. That's what I care about. I have had the best examples of gospel living growing up through mom and dad and all of my amazing siblings. It's great that we're examples to each other, but we ALREADY HAVE THE GOSPEL. Duh. haha. Please, make a goal to be better member missionaries and please tell me about it. Maybe you don't all actually read this letter, but you might as well do it now when  you only have to hear from me once a week. Whenever that dreaded day comes of going home, nothing can stop me from bugging you like crazy. Yay. Love you, exclamation point!

Sister Burwell and I are exhausted. We put so much into the exchanges that we go on that when we get back to Ventura, to our area, we feel like we're moving in slow motion. It's a good exhaustion, though. It's being exhausted in the Lord's work. That is definitely a rewarding feeling. The amazing thing is that He helps us quickly renew our strength so we can go another week and help the sisters. I'm reallyexcited for this upcoming week because one of us, either Sister Burwell or I, will be in our area everyday this week. I'm grateful because we've felt like we're neglecting our area. We know it's not true, but it's hard to not think that at times.

As far as how I'm doing after this past week, I feel a lot better. My mind is clear, and I don't feel burdened down anymore. I learned a lot from what I went through, and now I'm more on guard toward allowing myself to entertain those thoughts of inadequacy, comparing, or competition. There were a lot of things that I learned from Conference about what I went through, since it's still on my mind at times. I had an interview with President Castro on Saturday night, and he talked to me about what I wrote about last week. I have also been thinking a lot about what we talked about in my interview. He really just took a lot of time to tell me that I'm doing really well and what I'm doing well at. He was building me up and helping me see the things that are "in my blind spots" at times. I've been praying to really understand who I am, personally, so I don't need to rely on anyone telling me those things. I shouldn't need someone to tell me how great I am, or how much I've changed or grown. I should be able to go to the Lord and hear those things from Him, but also recognize them in myself. I am very grateful that he was willing to point those things out for me, but I don't want to have to always have that from someone. I do think I need some reassurance at times in little things that people say, but my overall self-worth can't depend on someone telling me what it is. I know who I am. I know where I stand with the Lord, but now I just want that to be more solidified within myself. It's a good feeling that I have right now. I feel in control, when a week ago I felt totally out of control. I am capable of so much more than what I tell myself at times, and I've been really recognizing that this past week.

We had Mission Leadership Council this week. It was awesome I learned a lot! President Castro talked about faith, hope, and charity. That was really good. I love how inseparable they are, but when we study them we can pull them apart to really understand each attribute. In the end, though, you can't have one without the other. It's great. One huge thing that stuck out to me is that Charity doesn't come from us, but it works through us by revelation. It's not OUR love. It's "the pure love OF CHRIST." It doesn't say the "pure love of Sister Bennett" or whoever else wants to posses it. Charity works through us. I love that, because it puts even more emphasis on the fact that we truly are just instruments in the hands of the Lord.

Sister Burwell and I were asked to do some training at MLC, again, but I'm really grateful for all of the opportunities Sister Burwell and I are given to teach in those types of settings. I learn so much as we prepare, and I just love teaching the other missionaries. That's what a huge focus is for me, just helping the other missionaries. I feel like I've been blessed to have my vision raised a lot on my mission, and I want to share that vision with everyone else.

Jed is doing great. We had lunch with him in between sessions of General Conference, and I'm just so amazed by his growth and perspective on things. He loves Heavenly Father so much. He just talked to me a lot about how he's seen Heavenly Father more in his life, because he goes to God more. He said he used to struggle when he was at school, teaching, because he would want to do everything perfectly, but lately he stops and takes time to say a little prayer or listen to a hymn on his phone. Jed has gained a lot of peace as he's been progressing in the gospel. I love that. That is the most important thing for us to do as missionaries - direct the investigators toward their Heavenly Father. Yes, Jed and Stefanie really love us a lot, they trust us, but I know that they trust God more and look to Him more. I'm getting so excited for their wedding and for Jed's baptism! I'm really excited to meet their family and for Jed's family to feel the Spirit at his baptism. I'm just excited. Super, DUPER excited! It's only two weeks away now, that's great!

Diana came to the ward picnic on Monday and LOVED it. She actually went without us, because we got there late, and when we showed up she just said "hi" and kept doing what she was doing - talking to members, playing with her kids. I loved it! There were so many people at the picnic that Sister Burwell and I have taught, and it was really amazing to see how they don't need us. They were all being taken care of by the members of the ward. Yes, they said "hi" and were excited to see us, but if we had never shown up they would have felt fine. Jed and Stefanie were there as well, and I can't tell you how popular Jed is. Everyone wants to talk to him and be around him. All the men in the ward were flocked around him. I loved that! It makes total sense. Jed is a very special person. You can't help but just be around him and talk to him. I understand why everyone loves him so much.

Since the picnic, Diana and Phillip have fallen off of the map, kind of. We went to see Diana yesterday, because she had something come up on Saturday and couldn't meet. She seemed a little sand-offish, but it's ok. Her boyfriend's parents were there so maybe that affected her. We're meeting with her next Saturday, but I really don't want to wait that long. She needs to keep progressing like she has, and not seeing us for a whole week may not be the best. We're praying about it and we'll figure it out. Last night, I was just pleading with the Lord to help her read the Book of Mormon and to stay engaged in learning and progressing. It was just so obvious how happy it made her to come to church and associate with such great people. I'll be praying for her a lot this week.

It was a great week.

Love,
Sister Bennett

Jed and Stefanie joined us to get pedicures! Compliments of Sister Pellum (Aubrey's mom)

The Laws made Sister Burwell and me a Harry Potter dinner. We're drinking butter beer....and we look a little drunk!

"Do You Believe Christ, or Do You Just Believe In Christ?"

September 30, 2013



Dear Family,

"Do you believe Christ, or do you just believe in Christ?" This quote really resounds with me right now. I had a hard week, and I didn't think I would write about it, but I think it's important to share even the hard experiences especially because it gives me the opportunity to reflect on the things that I've learned. I have never felt the way I felt this past week, throughout my entire mission. I've had ups and downs, of course, but what I went through this week was so much different than anything I've experienced. I don't really know when it started, but I know when it hit me the hardest. I started to feel myself pulling away from Sister Burwell. I think it's just a defense for when she finishes her mission, because the last time we were separated it was very hard for me. Thoughts of competitiveness and comparing kept coming to my mind, and I felt like I can never be a missionary like Sister Burwell. As I continued to entertain those thoughts, I would realize that those thoughts aren't from God, but I felt like as hard as I tried I couldn't get them out of my mind. I then started to have thoughts of inadequacy and shortcomings. I felt like I wasn't measuring up to what President Castro thought I would become, what my family thought I would become, and most importantly what the Lord wanted me to become. I've never felt so lost and alone when I was constantly around people. I just felt disgusted with myself, and then I'd realize how I was feeling and become more upset because I allowed myself to feel that way. It seemed to me like the weaknesses that I've worked the hardest to change on my mission had not been strengthened in any way. Sister Burwell knew that there was something wrong. She told me that I've looked like there was just a cloud around me that was trapping me. I started to recognize that I was experiencing some kind of depression. Sister Burwell has been so patient with me throughout this. I'm sure it's been really hard for her, because she has so much going on herself. I mean, she's going home soon. That's enough to think about and then there's me, adding my burdens to her load.

I guess the reason that I share this is because it's more of an experience of triumph. Sister Burwell was very blunt with me about what she felt was going on with me. She talked to me about relying on the Lord for things that people can't give to us. The thing that really hit me that she shared was that it seems that there are times when I don't really believe or recognize who I really am as a daughter of God. That was hard to swallow. That forced me onto my knees. I wanted to know how I really felt. It was good to have Sister Burwell, but she doesn't know. I know that I am a daughter of God. I know how much He loves me, but what she said was great because it pushed me to strengthen that testimony and revisit that conviction that I've already gained. I spent a long time on my knees this past week. Sometimes, I would just sit on a chair in the kitchen for a while after I prayed so I could listen and feel what the Lord wanted me to learn. My prayers were answered at church. I repeatedly felt the love of my Heavenly Father. I honestly was barely listenening to what anyone said, but I was listening to the Spirit. I felt like the Savior was sitting next to me waiting for me to let Him help me. The Lord is always there with arms outstretched...that's what the scriptures teach. I need to practice what I preach, and constantly reach out for His hands. I am grateful for the trials that we go through in life. I'm grateful that I can trust in my Savior who understands me better than I undesrtand myself, and that He'll put me through the refiners fire. I'm sure it's hard for Him and for Heavenly Father to see, but they can bear it because they know what I can become as I am refined and as those impurities are burned from me. I love the Lord. He is who I need to lean on at all times, in every hour and moment.

I feel like I can't say enough how grateful I am for Sister Burwell. I'm trying to not think about her going home, because that's going to be rough for me. She's my best friend. I've never trusted someone outside of my family as much as I trust her, and she's a strength to me spiritually. I just love that our friendship was built purely on a spiritual foundation and it's propelled by our love for the Lord and for Heavenly Father's children. I really feel that she needed to serve a mission, partially, for me. I have seen the Lord work through her SO MANY TIMES to help me in my conversion process. She is an administering angel on earth, just like Elder Holland spoke about, that I get to have with me all the time. I know that when she leaves I will be ok, because I have the Lord and I will still have her, but I just don't like thinking about it. Our friendship is very special, and I actually might be able to get married someday because she's helped me so much. I'm especially grateful for her support these past few weeks as I was going through the trial that I went through. She helped me so much.

Amidst this trial that I've been facing these past few weeks, I was still able to feel the joy that comes when we forget ourselves. The hardest times for me were when I had  time to think, so I am grateful that I was kept so busy that I didn't have a ton of time to think. We saw some great miracles in our area this week, and we had very fulfilling experiences with doing training for the sisters and with going on exchanges.

I went on an exchange with Sister Reyes this week in Goleta. She's a great missionary, especially since she's only been out for a transfer and a half. She has changed a lot since we came last transfer to work with her and Sister Stoker. Their companionship is so strong. I wanted to know what had changed that helped them be so united, because the other sisters really need that in their companionships. They've both humbled themselves toward each other, but really toward the Lord. I can see that they're both so focused on understanding and doing the will of the Lord, that it naturally unifies them. It's amazing because so often I would share something with Sister Reyes from Preach My Gospel or the scriptures, and she would say that she and Sister Stoker had been discussing that recently. Sister Reyes has such a nice way about her. She's very natural with the people we teach and is never trying to be someone else. She just teaches what she knows and bears powerful testimony of Jesus Christ. Honestly, I didn't really know what to tell her to work on specifically because all the things that she can improve on will just come with time. It felt good to build her up and let her know that she is doing well. We all need to hear that we're doing well sometimes; not because we're prideful, but because we're human. Sister Reyes and I actually experienced a great miracle on our exchange. We drove to try a potential investigator that we had planned to see at that specific time, but when we got there Sister Reyes realized that she and Sister Stoker had already spoken to this person and he wasn't interested. She suggested that we move on with our plans and just do what we planned in the next half hour, but I felt like we had planned to be there for a reason. I told her we just need to talk to one person and we can move on to our next planned activity. We got out of the car and tried a few doors on that street where she and Sister Stoker hadn't talked to anyone. No one answered. I started feeling like "oh boy, am I wasting the Lord's time with this?" I pushed that idea aside and told myself that I had received a prompting and we were going to obey it. We went to a connecting street to try to find a house that they hadn't already talked to people at. There was one house that had a car in front of it, so I suggested that we try that house. We met a woman named Natasha there. We began to teach her the restoration and Sister Reyes was teaching her about how we have a Heavenly Father who loves us. When I looked up she was crying. She told us that she had been having a really hard day and that she couldn't believe that we were at her door. We testified of the divinity and reality of Jesus Christ as our Savior and how we can have a personal relationship with Him. She accepted the opportunity to learn more and the sisters will be going back this week to teach her! That was amazing! Planning is a divine activity. Absolutely. I am grateful for the guidance of the Spirit and the blessing the Lord grants us when we are obedient.

I also had a great exchange with Sister Snow in Santa Maria. She and Sister Higgins are perfect for each other. Sister Snow is so hard for me to read, so I constantly felt like I was second guessing the advice and feedback I was giving to her. We talked a lot about leadership and what it means to be a leader because I know that's something she strives for. I shared my experience with her about when I was asked to have this assignment. I never wanted to be a traveling sister/sister training leader. It was the last thing on my list of "to dos" but the Lord had other plans for me. I felt really strongly that I needed to testify of the Lord's plan for us and that we need to follow the Spirit and gain the confirmation that what we're doing is a part of His plan. Aspiring to be a leader isn't what the Savior would have done, because that would have made things about Him. We talked a lot about motives and what should drive our actions. I think she was really listening, but tries to act like she already knows these things. I'm not sure why, but it just felt like that. She is a great missionary and a really good person. She wants to be the best she can be, and she will be as she allows the Lord to make her into that person.

We have some amazing investigators that the Lord is allowing us to teach right now, and He just keeps blessing us with miracles whenever we're in our area. Diana, an investigator we've taught a few times, made HUGE strides forward in her progression in just two days. We went over on Saturday afternoon for our appointment with her. When she opened the door she looked so tired. She told us that she had been taking a "power nap" and wasn't feeling the best. We ignored the last part and went right in. She had tons of laundry all over her living room that she had just washed, so we sat down and started folding it for her. She fought us at first about it, but eventually gave in. I think she secretly wanted us to help. We watched the Restoration DVD while we folded so she could gain a better understanding of Joseph Smith and what he did means for her. She enjoyed the movie and shared that she really felt like she identifies with Joseph. She said she's been confused about what to do. We talked to her about baptism and invited her to be baptized on November 9th. She responded by saying, "Woah. November 9th? That has a really nice ring to it." She accepted the invitation to prepare for the 9th. When we were teaching her, she talked about how she never really gets time to herself and that she feels like everyone in her home (her boyfriend, dad, brother and 4 kids) don't really understand her. Well, that's what the Relief Society is for. We invited her to come to the Relief Society dinner and broadcast with us that evening and she immediately said yes! She loved it so much! She met so many people and she really felt the Spirit. Even just during the dinner, I asked her what she thought and she said that she just felt really good being there. She felt super positive and happy. At the tables for dinner, there were these cute little magnets that had a quote from Elder Ballard about service. She asked us to round up any extras because she wanted to give them to her friends with an invite to church! She's doing missionary work and she isn't even baptized yet! Yesterday, she came to church as well. She had to bring her newborn baby, Nico, with her. It was a miracle because he slept through all three hours of church. She said he's never slept so long! The members in the ward were very welcoming and inviting toward Diana. All of the young moms that we were hoping she would meet came right up to her and said hello. They got her phone number so they can invite her to "park days" and other things that they do together, and I was so grateful for that. Diana is really looking for some good friends that she can go to for help and support. I just love her. She kept telling everyone that she's getting baptized
on November 9th and was inviting them to come. The craziest part was that Jed used to be her teacher in high school because Diana is only 26! That's a miracle, too! We feel like maybe Jed can get through to Diana's boyfriend so we can teach him to so they can get married. We'll see, I guess.

Jed is doing really well. He and Stefanie came to all three hours of church again and really enjoyed it. We had a lesson with them after church and it is so obvious how much the Lord is blessing them for the sacrifices and changes they're making to follow Him in their lives. Stefanie talked about how close Jed is to the Lord, and I know it's true. He wants to do what Heavenly Father expects of him. That's why he went to church last week without Stefanie. He understands what's most important. Stefanie talked about how with OCD he usually isn't very flexible, but he is so flexible when it comes to things related to church. To me he just seems so much more at peace. He reads in the scriptures and Ensigns everyday and I can see the light in his eyes becoming even brighter. His baptism is going to be so amazing. I seriously can't wait. I wish it would just get here already!

I'm doing well. The Lord is aware of me and He is helping me continue on amid sunshine or rain. That's the truth.


I love you,
Sister Bennett

My desk

This is where we did all of our planning